The Power of Respectful Opposition

Like so many people around our nation, and around our world, I have been watching the news with greater and greater concern.  It is getting to the point where real communication seems impossible.  It can easily lead us to despair.  But my world was rocked Tuesday night by a local event that gave me hope.

The family of Andrew Valois has been planning to open a shooting range in Frederick County Maryland near the historic and beautiful Sugarloaf Mountain. This range raised the ire of residents, land preservationists, anti-development proponents, historic preservationists and many others.  It was supported by an equally broad coalition of sportsmen and gun owners.   At several planned zoning commission meetings, citizens gathered in large numbers to praise or vilify the plan and for reasons as varied as the audience.

As you can imagine, in the current political climate surrounding land use, 2nd Amendment rights, gun control and  environmental activism, the debate was as loud as it was passionate.  Both sides cheered and jeered at all the expected statements and plotted and planned to make sure their voice was heard and their outcome ensured.  And so the stage was set for this past Tuesday evening when all were gathered for the completion of an already marathon zoning hearing stretching multiple days.  And then....something unexpected happened.  I was there to hear it but let me quote our local Frederick News Post newspaper:

The news from Andrew Valois came at the outset of what was expected to be a lengthy hearing before the Frederick County Board of Zoning Appeals, which was reviewing the range project. At the close of his roughly 10-minute statement, Valois said Old Line is withdrawing its application for approval from the appeals board.

Valois said his family’s decision to back off its plans to build a training facility on Thurston Road came after hearing from neighbors who respectfully lodged their objections to the range.

“It is never an easy thing to admit when one is wrong. Choosing this location was not a good idea, and I was wrong,” Valois said.   By Bethany Rodgers News-Post Staff: 

To me the most important words in the whole article are: " ...after hearing from neighbors who RESPECTFULLY lodged their objections..."  In his comments he went into much greater detail about those objections and just how respectfully they were lodged. Then he compared that respect to the overt disrespect and vitriol he got from others.  It was the respectful exchange of ideas that persuaded his family to withdraw the plan.  And this got me thinking.  

As I hear of the ongoing tensions in Ferguson MO, strife in the middle east, genocide in Syria and Iraq and even our hateful and wasteful debates in the political centers around the country, I am struck by the lack of human dignity we often afford our opponents.  So often we use words and phrases  to dehumanize those with whom we do not agree.  We are out to win and persuade, not learn and understand. Often we want no common ground, only total capitulation of those who we see as opposing us.  And yet, here is a fresh example (there are actually many others) where respect and dignity win out.  

This is an important lesson as all of us who are drawn into debates and conversations every day.  The human dignity of all must come before winning.  That means the dignity of those we support and those we do not; even those who mean us harm.  I am not saying we should not hold strong opinions and defend them, but that the defense must not impinge on the dignity of another.   If we question what will happen when we forget this lesson, then all we have to do is listen to the news.  The absence of human dignity is driving much (thankfully not all) of the headlines and the results are terrifying.   

But what can we do? As community leaders, parents, workers, volunteers, citizens and residents, we can act in way that respects the human dignity of all.  We can teach our children and set an example for all around us.  As Michael Jackson one wrote: "I'm starting with the man in the mirror." 

Please let me know what you think.